FOUNDER'S CORNER ~ THE BIG BOOK AND THE TRADITIONS ~
Dear Recovery Friends ~
Many of you reading this will remember our letter
to you about the traditions, something which we
honor above all else. One of the traditions is
about unity and why it is so important to the
Recovery community and other groups who are
dedicated to serve compulsive eaters. Another
tradition is about not participating in or having an
opinion of something that is considered an
"outside interest."
As the weeks go by, you will be hearing more
talk about the traditions ... and I would like to
urge you to read the traditions yourself. They
are found in what we lovingly call the Big Book.
Written in the 1930s, it is as true today as it
was then. Read them carefully. You will find
those who attempt to interpret the traditions in
ways other than the writers of the Big Book
intended. Bill and Bob are the Founders of the
12 Step recovery program which means so
much to our community.
Bill and Bob had a lot of common sense.
Happy March, Loopies!
@-}-}-}------
Love in recovery,
Mari
~ GETTING ORGANIZED ~
I'm in the processs of overhauling my timetable
now that my daughter's back in school; I'm
back to work and we have recommenced our afterschool
activities. I find the state of my dayplanner is
also a pretty good yardstick of the state of my
recovery. In order to meet my various obligations,
it's important for to pencil in everything. I'm
not just referring to my business appointments, I'm
referring to ALL aspects of my life, especially
Program tools. So, daily planning doesn't just
mean soccer games, meetings with the
principle and parents, PTA meetings and birthday
parties - it also means entering my daily
food plan, exercise plan, relaxation plan, devotions,
meetings, sponsor/sponsee work, and service
obligations. If I don't do this - things begin to
get overlooked and can quickly set up a negative
domino effect which can lead to relapse.
Love in recovery,
Rob
~ TRG ADM ~ The Administrative Hub ~
We are very honored to be the administrators
of The Recovery Group.
Where else can such a community be found? A home that
was conceived for compulsive eaters who use the 12
Steps to attain and maintain recovery. Not only are
there OA meetings 24 hours a day with caring
and dedicated leaders, there are also many loops for
those seeking Experience, Strength and Hope from
others who share their disease of compulsive eating.
Studies for the 12 steps and the Big Book, daily
meditations,all written by members of TRG, a monthly
newsletter...all of these things can be found here.
Other Trusted Servants keep track of and distribute
lists of members who have volunteered to become
sponsors and telephone angels. Many writings by
compulsive eaters are also on the web pages of The
Recovery Group site.
There are even more aids for compulsive eaters, but
the thing that makes me the proudest of TRG is the
dedication and caring that I find among the many
Trusted Servants that keep these services available
day after day. Thank you all!!
In loving service to all,
Nancy & Dodee, Administrators
The Recovery Group
http://www.TheRecoveryGroup.org
Contact:
TRGAdm@TheRecoveryGroup.org
~ ODAT LOOPS DIVISION ~
The ODAT Group Loops
The ODAT groups are special focus groups for those
COEs who want to share their program with those who
have a similar focus. We have groups for those of the
same religion (LatterDaySaints, Pagan, Jewish,
Christian), groups for those in certain age groups
(Silver, Teens); groups for those with specific
medical/physical challenges (Pain, PMS, Diabetes,
Depression, Disabilities) and those for people who are
challenged by the people/relationships in their lives
(Relationships, Anger, Divorce, Rainbow, Parenting,
Pregnancy and Motherhood, Grief, Al-Anon, Oanon)
Some of our groups can be helpful to those who are
COEs and are also challenged by an additional
addiction. We have the AA group, for those who are
both COE and alcoholics; Spending, for those who are
COEs and are also having issues with compulsive
spending; Drug Abuse, for those who are also addicted
to other drugs, and SexAndLoveAddiction for those who
are addicted to sex and love. If you have these other
addictions, it might help your OA program to be able
to discuss them with other COEs who share your
additional addiction.
If you have any questions about these or any other
ODAT group please contact the Division Chairperson.
Donna
ODAT Division Chairperson
Email:
odatadm@yahoo.com
Web page: www.theRecoveryGroup.org/odat/index.html
~ RECOVERY LOOPS DIVISION ~
The Recovery Loops Division is made up of TRG's
Twelve-step general sharing support groups. Our common
mission is to provide a safe and supportive space for
anyone who wants to recover from the disease of
compulsive eating to share their experience, strength,
and hope with others. In addition, some of these loops
also have a special focus. The loops that make up this
Division are: Anorexia and Bulimia, The Big Book, 200
Plus, Journey to Recovery, Meditations, OA Friends, OA
Newcomers, OA Recovery, Relapse, Sponsor-Sponsee-Talk,
Working the Steps (“WTS”), and WTS Weekly.
We'd like to welcome Lisa as the new coordinator for
OA Newcomers and OA Friends loops, as well as Karen as
the new coordinator-in-training for Anorexia and
Bulimia loop. Several of the Recovery Group Loops are
in need of coordinators. I know that giving service by
being a coordinator of a loop has added a lot to my
own recovery and hope that you will consider this
opportunity to give service. If you are interested in
becoming a coordinator, please contact me at:
the address below.
Respectfully submitted,
CherylS, Chair
The Recovery Group Loops Division
More details about these support groups can be found at:
www.theRecoveryGroup.org/trg.html
Contact: recoveryloopsadm@yahoo.com
~ TRG SPONSOR PROGRAM ~
It's a privilege to sponsor someone. And it's one of
the ways we stay in recovery.
WHAT DOES A SPONSOR DO?
- A sponsor's primary responsibility is to help a
sponsee work the 12 Steps
- A sponsor helps us work the 12 Steps by providing
explanation, guidance and encouragement.
- A sponsor helps us get established quickly in our
Fellowship by explaining basic concepts and
terminology and by introducing us to other members.
- A sponsor is a safe person whom we can learn to
trust.
- A sponsor can answer the many questions that we can
have as newcomers or develop as "mid-timers."
- A sponsor can help us in the process of self-
examination that the Steps require.
- A sponsor encourages us to read the basic text of
our fellowship and other program literature and
to engage in Fellowship activities and service
work.
- A sponsor can monitor our progress, confront us when
it is appropriate and generally help us stay on
the recovery path.
- A sponsor confronts our behavior, not our being, and
he or she does it with compassion.
- A sponsor reminds us to apply 12 Step principles in
our lives.
- A sponsor models the 12 Step program of recovery.
- A sponsor's role to encourage and guide us through
the 12-steps
WHAT A SPONSOR DOES NOT DO:
- A sponsor cannot keep us in recovery.
- A sponsor is not our therapist
- A sponsor should not attempt to control our lives or
encourage an unhealthy dependence.
- A sponsor should not take advantage of us our
exploit us in any way.
SOME FACTORS TO CONSIDER IN CHOOSING A SPONSOR:
- Has what we want
- Lives in the solution
- Walks the talk
- Has a sponsor
- Emphasizes the steps
- Usually has more time in recovery than we do
- Has worked more steps than we have
- Is available
- Emphasizes the spiritual aspect of the program
Please see The Recovery Group's website, below, that gives several
suggestions on how to go about finding a sponsor.
Respectfully submitted by:
TRG Sponsor Coordinators
Patt and Cate
TRG Sponsor Coordinators
www.TheRecoveryGroup.org/sponsors.html
Contact:
Sponsors@TheRecoveryGroup.org
~ THE RECOVERY TELEPHONE ANGELS ~
(\0/) (\0/) (\0/)
/ \ / \ / \
Dear Friend in Recovery,
Many of you have heard of the Telephone
Angels, but have you ever thought of
becoming one?
There is an opportunity available for
you all to give back what you have
been given by carrying the message
through the use of the telephone. By
just being willing to accept phone
calls from fellow members of TRG when
you are available you will impact so
many and possibly help keep someone
from that first compulsive bite.
The only requirement to become a
Telephone Angel is that you must be
willing to use your telephone number
in order to take calls from TRG
members. You share up to the level
of your own experience.
Our program can be very simple, yet
just by a member of a loop reaching
out and making a phone call from a
list available to them, lives can be
changed. So many times I have been
going through a tough time and picked
up the phone and with the kind words
spoken on the other end I was able to
express my pain thus preserving my
Abstinence one more day.
And sometimes just the act of dialing
the phone and releasing the negative
energy, is enough so the negativity or
obsession can begin to be lifted and
another tool can then be utilized.
On the other side there have been so
many times when I received a call and
just the right thing was said. I know a
lot of times I would thank the person
for keeping me Abstinent, one more day
by listening to them because it got me
out of my own "stinking thinking."
So please consider being a Telephone
Angel. It is such an amazing way to
give back and serve at the same time.
I always love what Rozanne said in
her promise: "I put my hand in yours
and together we can do what we never
could do alone......" We all share
a common bond and need each other,
sometimes online email is enough and
sometimes we need more like a telphone
connection.
To join our list of telephone angels
and share your recovery with others
through this service please contact:
Telephoneangels@yahoo.com
In your email please include the
following information so that you may
be properly listed in the directory:
- Your name
- Email address
- Publish your email address? (Yes or No)
- What city and state you live in (this way people
can find someone closer to them)
- Your phone number ~ area code and
number
- Your time zone (like Eastern Standard)
- Best times to call?
- Should folks leave a message or not?
- And, any other info you want callers to know, such as: “What is the focus of your
Recovery?”
Note:
- We do not publish website mentions.
- No advertisements or spam is allowed.
- The Telephone Angel Directory is
published as an outreach tool for our
TRG Recovery Loop members ONLY
and is PRIVATE and CONFIDENTIAL!
- Phone numbers should never be
shared under any circumstances.
Thanks in advance for considering
giving service.
In service,
January Keck
Coordinator, Telephone Angels Directory
The Recovery Telephone Angels Program
Telephoneangels@yahoo.com.
~ NEWCOMER'S CORNER ~
Newcomers meetings are Monday and Tuesday, 8PM EST and Thursday 10PM EST
~ MEET Kirsti.~
Kirsti comes to us from down under (Australia) and is
the mother of three beautiful daughters, ages 5, 4,
and 1, who just celebrated her first birthday! :)
In addition to being a wife and mother, Kirsti is also
a lawyer and singer in a jazz trio.
How did you find TRG, Kirsti?
" I had a friend on another support based website ...
and we became friends. As our chats became more
revealing, my friend recognized in me symptoms of
overeating, and introduced me to TRG."
What was your experience like when you found the
website and attended a meeting?
"Initially I thought that the meetings were definitely
not for me. I was worried about the focus on
religion. I come from a non-religious background, and
therefore thought that without religion, or belief in
a HP which is a fundamental premise of TRG, recovery
would not come to me. "
"What a surprise. I have found my own HP, a fully
supportive, and ever present HP and have commenced my
journey.."
What was it about TRG that kept you coming back?
"The friendship and yet the anonymity (strange
dichotomy I know). The ability to express the
thoughts/fears/gratitude that are in my mind directly
to others through the keyboard without filtering them
to please others is liberating."
Are there any thoughts about your recovery that you
would like to share?
"An important message to all those entering recovery,
is to not make any life changing or important
decisions in the first year of recovery. I
am living proof of this. With abstinence and a
connection with your HP comes a peace and serenity on
occasions that I have not experienced
before. For me, these feelings are interspersed with
great feelings of rejection which have surfaced since
becoming abstinent. Normally I would have eaten these
feelings. Without food, I have turned to other
ways to try and suppress the emotions, to stop me
feeling and working through these emotions, without
consciously realizing that I was trying
to avoid myself yet again. It is important to
recognise these sideways addictions and to put your
recovery FIRST."
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and
experience with us, Kirsti. It is a pleasure to have
you as a member of our group.
Love in recovery,
Marilyn (TRGMarils)
Newcomer's Meeting Leader
Email:
mtgadm@lists.therecoverygroup.org
~ SMASHING DELUSION ~
"We learned that we had to fully concede to our
innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the
first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like
other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed."
This passage from Chapter 3, More About Alcoholism, is
read at one specific meeting I attend - or try to
attend - each week. I know the lines by heart, know
the words from memory, yet it took a long time for me
to internalize and accept their meaning.
The delusion that I am like other people has to be
smashed.
Boy did I try to be like other people, especially
around food. I watched and observed people at work
and in restaurants and while with normie friends and
even tried to do what my nephew, almost 6, does when
he's full - he pushes the plate away. How could I do
that if I had no idea what "full" was?
Then I guess I'm not like other people who don't take
everything to heart. They don't get upset over little
things and then have to make phone calls to talk about
what's upsetting them, then do Steps to resolve it.
They don't have to look at their defects to or pray to
God to remove whatever in them was upsetting them in
the first place. Most of the time my thoughts are
peaceful and serene however let something go awry; I'm
like a robot with a loose wire and need the company
and conversation of other people just like me to
regain balance and serenity again.
Thank God I'm not like other people; if I was I would
not have found recovery and OA and a blueprint for
living and wonderful friends with whom I can talk from
the heart and with whom I can be myself.
Today was a snowy, cold and stay-at-home day in New
York, a day when I'd have been eating and isolating
and wondering when it would stop so I can get on with
what I need to do. I was home however I made calls
and went to online meetings and took a walk and still
wondered when it would stop snowing. The difference
is I wasn't alone.
Love,
Janie
~ PURPOSE ~
When I started my program, my purpose was very
clear... I wanted to stop eating compulsively.
I was one of the lucky ones who found abstinence early
on. It felt wonderful. My life began to improve in
many different areas. Even so, I continued working
the steps, having realized that the cause of my
disease was rooted in my thoughts and beliefs. If I
were to quit working the steps, I could easily slip
back into self-destructive mode.
Having found abstinence, however, suddenly made my
purpose less clear. Was I to concentrate on meeting
weight goals? Was I to concentrate on sorting out
friendships and making amends? Was I to concentrate
on rooting out character defects? Was I expected to
work on everything all at once? It can seem a little
confusing.
For myself, I try to use the program to create
awareness and get me through one more day... and use
that day to find something or do something that will
empower me.
Joy and peace,
Marilyn (Marils)
~ FROM THE TWELVE-STEP LITERATURE ~
~~ FROM THE AA BIG BOOK ~~
You say, "Yes, I'm willing. But am I to be consigned
to a life where I shall be stupid,boring and glum, like
some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without
liquor,/coe but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?"
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that.
It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous/OVEREATERS ANON
There you will find release from care, boredom and worry.
Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years
of your existence lie ahead.
c. 2001 AAWS, Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 152
With permission, Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
MY SHARE...
We have all thought these same thoughts, many times. If I
don't get a chance to eat my favorite desserts, have any
fun at all and not be able to eat with my friends, what is
the purpose of living? It would be a very boring existence
and make life dull and uninteresting!
This is one way (our old way), of looking at the problems
facing us. How is my life now?? Am I happy being obese,
not being able to wear any of my pretty clothes, being
totally out of shape and unable to walk very much? If
this is the way we want to live forever, then God bless us!
There is a better way. OA and the Recovery Group shows us
many tools to use to change these destructive habits into
useful and healthy ones. We can still go out and eat with
our friends. Just make better food choices, or as I've
done when I knew I'd be too pressured, stay at home and
feel like I succeeded at winning this time! It only takes
three weeks to change our bad habits into good ones, we are
told by the experts. I pray to my Higher Power to help me
achieve this goal, One Day At A Time (ODAT). I do want a better
life for myself!!
Many Blessings on your Path To Recovery,
Myrlene (Big Book and Recovery Group Coordinator)
